As 2020 comes to a close..

 

2019 is coming to a close, hopeful for 2020, I stand outside staring at the stars, overcome with emotions and finally healing from a severe heartbreak, the stars like my life, seemed like they kept their own memories. When I looked at certain memories, I could see constellations where they related to other memories, beginning to compare the sky with my life.., few years ago, when I was seriously unattached like I am right now, before the 18 carat gold engagement ring with a real stone, a dearest aunt of mine decided that she was going to play cupid. She was going to introduce me to her nephew, sounds complicated, but I am not related to this woman, which means I can actually marry her siblings’ kids’ right? Weird scenario. While my cousins (her kids), had a good laugh at the idea, their mother was dead serious. Barely had the idea settled in my mind than a date was set. While I thought the date was about a brief history on this nephew, my dearest aunt showed up with her sister ‘my future mother in law’, and the sister’s son ‘my future husband to be,……woi! To be continued…..

Besides Trump the entertainer, 2020 came with a virus that had a vengeance towards mankind, l pray the Chinese are currently not eating some live animal as this year draws to a close. Anyway, we soon lean that it’s not about the virus per se, it’s about the stress of being confined at home. It’s about a large part of the people, who due to the current challenging economic crisis and the confinement decreed in the face of the virus adversity, are suffering from fear, loneliness, deep poverty and hunger, and to add salt to injury the other continents are looking at Africa waiting for Africans to die and probably become extinct, that was my thought each time I watched the negativity about Covid and Africa. But God……..

People start losing jobs, and before covid fully hits, you start seeing and hearing strange deaths. Outside my office, a man parks his vehicle with the intention of going to quickly pick something from a shop  only for his own car to roll back and kill him, someone you know has committed suicide, someone lost a sister, a brother, a husband, a wife, and all these cases are not in any way related to Covid 19. I found myself struggling to make sense of the tragedy of death. Perhaps inevitable I found myself in a rabbit warren of unanswerable questions. The only useful conclusion I could arrive at was a philosophical one: I would find a convenient explanations for why we must die, but we are sustained by hope.

Yet covid 19 has become the unfortunate reality that we are still exploring.

Unsurprisingly, the pandemic has not only triggered a wave of mental health issues, but on the positive side, people’s perspective on how to live a healthier lifestyle has increased as well.

Personally I walk out of 2020 having lost some friends and family. Loss of death and loss of friendship combined. There were moments I wished I could hug those who were going through heartaches, I am not good and saying ‘it will be okay’ when a loss has occurred, for I know, that it is never okay, most times hugs and silence does it for me.

If there is a lesson in 2020, it showed us how precious life is, so next year do not let fear win! Book that flight, apply for that opportunity, say ‘I love you’ more. Read those books. Start that business. Stop procrastinating. Unfriend that person, get other friends. Learn that skill. Take that risk and live while you can

I finally managed to get rid of a simple item off my bucket list, I visited the place I grew up in with a once upon a time friend, while I was there and in a moment of imperfection punched someone on the face, while I was busy beating myself to it, I had to go back to remember that mistakes and failures should not define anyone. When you make a mistake just get up and go again, what are you tripping for? You have two choices, You either get over it or die mad.  Just keep living, keep waking up in the morning. I am an Ephesians 3:20 all day long. I expect God to do exceeding and abundantly over all I think and ask because I honor Him. His blessings will chase me down and overtake me. I still remain thankful for next breaths and tomorrow sunrises. 

I have read over 20 books, the 5 AM CLUB, got me (grab a copy, and you will thank me later). I close the year with the book ‘HI, GOD, ITS ME AGAIN by Nicole crank.

Going forward;

Ø  Don’t overthink life. Trust that you made the right decision and continue to grow

Ø  Gamble everything for love, if you are a true human being. If not leave the gathering as half-heartedness doesn’t reach majesty

Ø  Dedication and discipline beats brilliance and giftedness every day of the week.

Ø  I have lost a friend whom I thought was my ride or die, not through covid, friendship fades away, and while you are busy punching yourself on what you should have done or not done, life goes on

Ø  It is not your job to rescue people from foolishness.

Ø  Before you expect faithfulness or loyalty from a person, be sure to observe whether they have it in other areas of their life; are they faithful in their job, or trusted by their friends? Virtues like honesty are the core of a person’s character and no one can be selective honest. What you see in one area cuts across their life. If they cheat and cut corners at their job they will do the same in their relationship.

Ø  When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen.

Ø  Engage with people more than pixels. Looking at a phone is quick and undemanding, texting is easier than talking, it gives you intimacy without danger. But I would rather spend time looking into someone’s eyes when communicating. Replace the text with coffee meetings. Make a promise of presence.

Ø  Take your soul seriously; it is easy to pretend that what we watch and how we speak have no effects on us. But the constant pounding of hatred and dehumanization that marks so much of our media have consequences for our character. Part of who you are is the sum of the influence you choose. You only get one soul; don’t squander it in things unworthy of its majesty.

Ø  Increase your kindness; if you wish to be kind do something good. The great secret of moral growth is that it often begins from the outside. Behave generously even when you do not feel like it and the habit will grow as will your innate quality of kindness.

Ø Choose someone to forgive; all of us have legitimate grievances in our lives. Some people are very had to forgive but you need not begin with the toughest cases. Small acts of grace will grow. The more you forgive, the less the world can injure you; forgiveness is a soft shield for your soul.

Ø In forgiving, include yourself. Leave a dropped stitch in the knitting of your life. There will always be more possibilities to get something wrong than to get it right. Allow yourself the latitude of mistakes, without self-punishing. God is supposed to be perfect, not human beings. Have expectations of yourself, but don’t enforce them with a hammer.

May the next year be kind, with massive breakthroughs, and may all the strongholds be broken, May our good Lord defend His investment in your life.

Don’t plant “THORNS” on my walkway because tomorrow you may visit me barefooted.